Sub Par News [Vol. 97; Issue 4]     |      PREVIOUS Issue     |      NEXT Issue

Steedman/LaFontaine pull stunning upset. That's right! Steedman and LaFontaine
pulled out all stops and upset the Roedel/Wanback tandem. Although the Peerless
Prognosticator picked Roedel/Wanback in a squeaker Hal and Jerry proved him wrong
and beat the high priced talent. But as picked the match was a squeaker. It came down to
Hal making a putt on the last hole and Paul or Don needing to make a birdie to claim
victory. Hal made his putt and the rest is history.

What happened to Clem? The new team of LaPietra/Laraway is in deep trouble. Phil,
obviously picked Clem to bail his ass out of the stew, when The Old Woodsman Bob
June deserted him, for a job at a Pro Shop with unlimited golf privileges. He picked Clem
as his savior and to keep him in the hunt for the coveted Higher Ed Trophy. To his
chagrin, Clem has not been producing. Last week a Wiff, this week a 52. Phil, perhaps
Clem is trying to tell you something. Maybe he didn't want to be your partner but felt
obligated!! Granted the team won but that was only because of the incompetence of
Hebert/Marone, who in spite of getting more blows then Johnny Wadd in a porn flick,
failed to "come" through. I knew this team was sad, but how sad? Well they are not at
the bottom of the barrel. That spot is reserved for the Merry/Gardy duo. Talk about a
team that's clueless. Gardy is still in love and Bill.... Well Bill, just sucks! He tried in vain
to help Tom in the last match, but you must remember, a Yellow Submarine sinks to the
bottom and settles near the whale shit. Guess who is on the bottom.

This weeks matches might be a little tougher to pick then last weeks. The Peerless
Prognosticator
, easily could have picked 5 for 5 if he had more faith in Hal and Jerry and
their claim on the leagues top spot. As you all should know Hal and Jerry are used to the
pressures and handle them well. At least they handle them the same way every time,
WITH BEER! Enough said.

For this weeks matches you can expect the following results:

Kosek/Storms vs LaPietra/Laraway Normally this would be an easy match to pick.
The talent is there and the lack of same is also. However; With Clem playing as poorly as
he has and Phil having to carry him... Well it could be a challenge . Ken is solid, except
for last week ( it seems he wavered a bit and couldn't carry Russ far enough) and Russ still
seems to think he is in the Bahamas... But then again Phil is trying to play for two since
Clem has not held up his end of the deal... PICK Kosek/Storms over the team reaching
for a place in the rankings.

Murray/McTague vs Rinella/Rinella Watch this match! This could be a good one! It
seems that the "injection" of Murray as McTague's partner has brought new juices to
life. McTague, who in prior years been suspect in his golf talent, has come to life. Could
it be his year off and new found talent from heart surgery? Or just the fact he now has a
"real" partner? Well let me tell you this. His partner is not great shakes. Just another
Irishman that thinks he looks good in Knickers. Can Joe play golf? Sometimes. But he
has never played in a league like this before. Can he hold up to the pressure. Only time
will tell. Father & Son (Rinella Squared) will put on a valiant effort only to come short.
Murray/McTague will prove too much in this match, but don't bet the farm on it. Go light
and don't bet them every week. They have losses in the future.

Hebert/Marone vs Steedman/LaFontaine This match calls for no wagers. There is no
line available. You have the epitome of the league against the dregs, (excuse me if it
weren't for Merry/Gardy). How can this be a match? I'll tell you how. Hebert has an
extremely strong desire to beat Steedman. I can still recall when Hebert was a double
digit handicap and went against Steedman and threw 39 at him. He has never let him
forget it. Well this time it will be different. Steedman's partner will be there and Hebert
can't do 39 even if he believes it is half of 69. With Hal by his side and Marone by
Hebert's, this could be ugly. Not a pretty face in the foursome, and a wide margin of
victory for Hal and Jerry. The only thing to worry about in this match is how much beer is
consumed. If you can get the action go with the front runners by whatever margin you
can get. This could be a shut out.

Dooley/K. Herbs vs Merry/Gardy If this was based on talent and handicap alone it
would be no choice at all. Merry/Gardy (on paper) should kick ass. BUT... Merry/Gardy
have sucked hind tit all season long. Last year too. Lets face it as a team they suck!!!
Gardy has threatened to dump Bill since he got stuck with him but hasn't had the balls to
do it. Now Gardy is in love and Bill is a has been. This is sad. No talent, + no balls + no
cohesiveness- fortitude to win, and what do you get, Merry/Gardy LAST PLACE IN
THE LEAGUE!
If Dooley/Herbs can play to their minimal talent, they should win easily.
If Gardy can shake the love hold, and smack Merry around a little, different match. Pick!
Dooley/Herbs

D. Roedel/Wanback vs J. Herbs/R. Roedel Well this time they meet it is a different
story. Old time readers will recall that the last time these teams met it was for the League
Championship. Somehow Don Played poorly and brother Ron won the Championship,
much to Paul's dismay. Now they meet again. But... there is nothing on the line. Both
teams are in the middle of the pack. Joe is back, Ron is lame, Paul and Don just got beat.
Where does it go from here? Don wants to prove he can whip his brother and even
though Paul can't play a lick on this side, they will KICK ASS!! This should be no
contest. If it is, Paul should consider his options for next year. If this match is even close,
it's brotherly love rather then team loyalty. If Paul and Don don't win big, there should be an
investigation.

Remember: all league members, if you want to rebut anything in this column, or
have anything worth including in this publication, get it to Steedman before
Wednesday of the week you wish it to appear, he will make sure the editor gets it.
The Editor will then decide if it is news worthy, and worth including in the
publication. If you don't act, Don't Bitch!


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